Category: Welcome

The Biggest Deal Nobody’s Talking About

Aye maaaan!

Hold up, so Voyager 1 has left the damn solar system and it’s not on the front page anywhere?  Y’all do realize what an achievement this is, right?  Voyager has now traveled farther than any man-made object to date.

Just so we are clear, this is a photo of Earth from Voyager 1 in 1990.  See that little blue dot in the brown band?  Yep, that’s us and everyone who has ever lived on Earth.  It’s been 23 years since that was taken.

Photo credit: NASA via Wikipedia.

There’s been controversy about whether Voyager 1 actually left for a year or so now, but it appears researchers are certain that Voyager 1 is now traipsing through the Milky Way.  It has actually gone where no man has gone before!

Remember V’ger, anyone else a little nervous?  Could you imagine Voyager 1 being intercepted and upfitted by a race of aliens and returning to us?  I’ll be long dead by the time that happens, but it is kinda cool to consider.  On the other end of the spectrum, a probe entering a black hole and becoming self-aware was a very similar story to the movie Event Horizon– the scariest movie ever made.  Let’s hope that sh*t doesn’t happen.

The V’ger entity and resultant merger with Ilia and Lt. Decker is supposed to be the beginning of the Borg, so, yeah, let’s hope all of that doesn’t happen.  In fact, let’s hope that the galaxy is filled with gentle, kind My Little Ponies or something.

In fact, maybe there is good reason for this not to be front page news after all…

Happy Friday everyone!

Pop culture classic: ‘Galaxy Quest’

keithroysdon

galaxy-quest-movie-poster-

I’ve heard the argument made, online, that “Galaxy Quest” is the best big-screen “Star Trek” movie. “Star Trek” reboot director J.J. Abrams apparently said as much. While I think the claim is made somewhat facetiously, there’s a lot to be said for the light-hearted 1999 sci-fi comedy.

Beyond the trappings of the movie, which looks at a group of has-been actors living off the fame of their cult TV show 20 years later, there are a lot of subtle and not-so-subtle nods to “Star Trek” the show, its cast and fandom.

The movie, directed by Dean Parisot, shows us the cast of the former “Galaxy Quest” series in the only setting in which they can thrive: Fan conventions. While the show’s captain, played by Tim Allen, basks in the glory of his adoring fans, the rest of the crew – Sigourney Weaver as the ship’s eye candy, Alan Rickman as…

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Spoiler-free Review of The Wolverine


First, let me say that I love me some Hugh Jackman.  I don’t know him personally, but everything about him just suggests that he is a stand-up guy who can act his behind off.  He’s a quadruple threat.  That said, not even he could save this slightly-worse-than-mediocre movie.  I was really excited about seeing this movie because I was hoping that they could make a good Wolverine movie.  Wolverine is probably the most explored character in all of X-men and, yet, they just can’t get the movies right.  I think they are going to have to reboot James Bond-style and make the movies darker to achieve what moviegoers want from the character.  Wolverine is impulsive, daring, self-sacrificing, brooding, and vulgar and Jackman hasn’t been given a script yet that allows him to show that.

The plot starts out good enough.  He is, as always, on a search for himself and missing his love, Jean Grey, who is pretty effective in her tiny role.  Famke Jennsen is so beautiful that she looks unreal anyway (hate her!).  Yukio is well cast and has some great scenes and I thought they did a great job in selecting Mariko as a foil to Wolverine.  That’s about it for the smaller parts.  Let’s not even get into the waste of screen time that was the Viper’s character and the Silver Samurai.  The f-ing Silver Samurai, how do you mess that up?  There is passion in that hyphen.

Aside from some great action sequences, the second half of the movie is just a waste.  I was honestly stunned at how bad the plot became.  And, I really just want filmmakers to stop selecting female villains just to have some eye candy.  It’s so unnecessary.

Rating: C with a sideye for the Viper character.  Wait for Redbox.

P.S.  Don’t go see it in 3D, no need for it.  And, yes, there is a great extra scene about halfway through the ending credits.

P.P.S. I don’t think there was one black person in the entire movie.  I mean the setting is Japan, but still, not one…in 2013?  Get with it Hollywood.

A Dirge for the Star Trek: Las Vegas Experience

The first time I went to Las Vegas, there was one place I knew I had to go.  That place where everyone’s at least a passing Trekkie.  Well, alas, it is no more.  The Las Vegas Hilton got rid of it years ago, but I still miss it.  I guess that it wasn’t bringing in the big bucks like its Elvis impersonator.  Yes, these grapes are sour.

If you’ve never been, I’ll paint the scene from memory:  You walk in and get in line and see a few prop exhibits and a Trek timeline.  But, the real fun starts when you get into the interactive Borg invasion.  The Borg Queen tops my list of villians because of her detached ruthlessness.  She was a bad mamajamma!  The simulation was dated, but I didn’t care because it was the closest I’d ever get to being on a starship.  Then, after you won, you could go into the Enterprise simulation and sit on,the Bridge and play an officer.  Again, it felt more like a science museum exhibit, but it was great for any trekkie.  Afterward, you could hang out in Ten Forward, drink some Romulan ale and chop it up with the Klingons wandering around.  The highlight for me was being choked by a Klingon female.  Then, of course, there was a neat gift shop with pretty good memorabilia.

Vegas felt a little emptier without any sort of Star Trek attraction there.  So, here’s to sadness.

FYI:  I hear there is a nice convention coming in August.  Check it out if you get a chance.

 

 

Spoiler-free Review of World War Z

Go see it.  Yes, on Friday.  And, yes, pay extra for 3D

 At the ripe old age of who’s counting, I can’t hang for the midnight shows anymore.  That said, World War Z would be an excellent movie to see at midnight on the opening night.  Why?  Because the movie is a total surprise.  None of the upfront trailers give you sufficient idea about what to expect in the movie.  I had a general idea that the movie was about some sort of apocalypse, but I had no idea how quickly I would be sucked into the action.  The movie begins with a sweet vision into the mundane daily life of a family.  On the news, there is some foreshadowing of danger, but that lasts for seemingly five minutes and, then, the movie becomes a rough and tumble ride to the finish.

 Okay, y’all already know that the movie is about zombies, right?  I’ve spent five minutes trying to figure out how not to tell you that, but it isn’t a secret.  Everything happens so fast that, afterwards, I realized that I couldn’t really tell you much about Brad Pitt’s acting.  The movie is essentially the Bourne Identity with zombies, but you can remember Matt Damon’s acting in that movie?  Despite his stellar body of work, I actually think Brad went with the Keanu Reeves less-is-more- playbook for this movie.  I’ll let more studied critics decide whether this is accurate, but his acting was a little flat to me.  So, the MVP award for the movie goes to the zombies.  That’s a sentence I never thought I’d write.  The zombies were creeeepy; the transformations happen so fast and the special effects take on a swarming, insect-like quality that will actually make you itch like you’ve seen maggots on rotting flesh.  This is why I recommend going to see it in 3D, you need to feel the chaos in this movie.  The 3D is very crisp, but still retains some grit and that’s why I liked it.  I actually forgot that I was wearing 3D glasses.

You know, in the hour that it has taken me to write this review, I’m quickly starting to feel less impressed with the plot as well.  They could have done much more with the material.  The trekkie in me always wants further exploration of political/social context, crosscultural communication and cooperation, and resolutions that don’t lead to bloodshed.  I always wonder how a weak screenplay comes out of movies based on books, but, alas, I think this might be a case.  My friend told me that the movie has nothing to do with the premise of the book.  But, given all of these caveats, I think you’ll enjoy the movie.

Grade:  B/B+  Zombies.

Miguel’s Epic Leg Drop: Proof that He’s an Alien???

In the split second it took for me to realize that the girls who Miguel accidentally jumped on were okay, I dissolved into giggles.  It’s a reflex.  I feel so bad and I’m so glad they are okay.  But, honestly, I think this is proof-positive that Miguel’s an alien.  I think he miscalculated gravity on our planet for a moment.  Yeah, that’s it…he just forgot which planet he was on.

1.  Miguel, you ain’t Prince.  Prince is somewhere laughing his size 0 behind off.  He’s said again and again that performers today need to stop trying to be like him.  See what happens– your nads land on someone’s head.  We all know Prince is an alien.  Prince might be like Michael Jordan in Miguel’s galaxy?

2.  Did he really have on 4-inch boots?  Those will be exhibit A in the civil trial that is sure to follow.  Those ain’t anti-gravity boots, homie.  Those are Rick James boots, best for crushing dirt into a couch.  Dude is like 5’2; what did he expect to happen?  Seriously, them joints looked like the heel was reinforced steel.

3.  There are some bright sides in all this:  Miguel definitely wasn’t lip-syncing, the girl who took the brunt was okay and she seemed really happy to meet Miguel.  Well, she probably didn’t want to meet his crotch first…but yeah.  That’s probably a mating ritual where Miguel’s from…

4.  From now on, when Miguel starts to do the crazy shimmy dance, people will know to duck like they are at a Gallagher show.  Was that little dance his species’ way of gathering energy from the universe to power such a jump?

5.  I got a little weak inside at the old chick who bent down to help the girl until Miguel grabbed her.  She tossed her away like a dead fish!  I immediately heard TLC’s “What About Your Friends” playing.  I guess the girl code ain’t what it used to be.  Why was she in the mosh pit anyway?  Hm, maybe this is a broader conspiracy?

All jokes aside, Miguel is an excellent performer and I hope he doesn’t end up having to work a second job at Burger King to pay for that girl’s long term care bills.

Miguel, Nanoo-Nanoo and sh*t, if you see this.  Try a little harder to blend in next time.

The Onion Review of Star Trek Into Darkness

Ok, read my review below and, then, watch this video.  Black Trekkie has a good sense of humor and I totally resemble the Onion’s remarks.

http://v.theonion.com/onionmedia/videos/videometa/206/zen_webm.webm

Qapla’, b*tches!

Hi Everyone!  Welcome to my blog!  I hope that you will enjoy my musings about the Star Trek Universe.  I hope to infuse the blog with humor about life, dating, and other happenings relevant to all the lovers of the Trek.  We are going to have some killer episode and movie reviews!  If you hadn’t guessed already, wait for it… I’m black, word to Styles P.  I rarely run into black trekkies with whom I can discuss the art of the Trek.  Usually, it comes out in a hushed tone after I’ve figured out that I have encountered another potential nerd.  Then, it turns into a trivia smorgasbord and discussions of who is the better captain.  Let me say, I AM the best captain in my own mind, but I’ll be glad to listen to your thoughts.

Who is Captain Jackson anyway?

Captain Jackson, short for  Captain Shante T’Pel Beyoncé Sisko Jackson, is the great grandchild of Uhura and Spock, after he stopped frontin’ on his feelings. It’s Hov.

In all seriousness, I am native North Carolinian who stayed up way too late in her formative years trying to watch the Next Generation re-runs that came on before Rawhide.  The Treks helped me dream about life beyond the hood and imagine a world without poverty.  In my real life, I fight poverty on a daily basis and attempt to expand the horizons and provide educational opportunities for low-income youth.

What is Black Trekkie?

Blacktrekkie.com is born out of a need to find you, whoever you are, who can relate to my trekki-ness.  It’s a place to dream and discuss about the Trek, the state of science fiction, physics, nerdiness, and why Levar Burton should get an Image award every year for Roots, Reading Rainbow, and keeping the Enterprise running despite being forced to wear a banana clip on his face, real talk. I know there are other black trekkies/nerds out there, maybe we can meet up one day.

You don’t have to be black to enjoy this site, heck, we even have a penchant for green b*tches around these parts.  All you need is a quick-witted sense of humor and geeky sensibilities.

And, why should I care about black rights in space?

-Because it’s the final frontier, mofo. Because Outkast said so.  Neil deGrasse Tyson can’t do it all by himself.

Live Long!

Dif-tor heh smusma (Live Long and Prosper) and please come back soon!